Diamonds to You

Helping you get the best out of yourself and others

Vol 3, Issue 3

Context Counts

Asperger’s Syndrome or merely a NERD?

Market Yourself Assertively

My Blog

Prior Newsletters

Recent Publications

So, how can I help you?

Hi,

Once again I am fascinated by the feedback you all give me.  Most of you like my chatty little personal message at the beginning of my newsletter and some of you have suggested it takes away from the professionalism.  I’m keeping it!  It’s clealy part of who I am – up front and personal as well as professional.

Context Counts

When I was a teenager I walked to school with two boys, Frank and Sandy.  My hair was long and some days I wore it in a pony-tail and on others loose and flowing.  Each day one of my two friends would like the way my hair looked and the other would suggest I wear it in the other style.  It was a valuable lesson – not simply that you can’t please all the people all the time.  What I actually learned was that context counts in making decisions.  Frank, who liked it loose was an occasional boy-friend.  Sandy, who liked it pinned back and neat and tidy, eventually became a very successful businessman and married one of my close friends.  They each had different values and a different context into which they graded my hairstyle of the day.

Often when people disagree they are both correct.  It’s about values, priorities and context.

Sitting in on a meeting of railroad consultants, there was an argument as to where to locate signal switches.  The two sides barely listened to each other as they went on and on for what felt like hours extolling the virtues of the research they had conducted and the decisions they reached.  Listening, I realized that Consultant A was concerned with speed and all the decisions they reached were to maximize the speed of the trains.  Consultant B was concerned with safety, and made decisions accordingly.

People with strong convictions, axes to grind, or prejudices they do nothing to overcome,  often take a side that doesn’t allow for consideration of other values.

As I write this, San Jose, California is continuing its struggle to find a name that suits all the Vietnamese members of the community.  There are those ardently supporting “Little Saigon” and others just as ardently wanting the more (according to them) professional sounding “Saigon Business District.”  These terms have great meaning to the local Vietnamese community and this is a dispute that must be taken seriously.

In the City of Santa Clara, where I live, there is a proposal for a large apartment, condo, and business complex which would back up against the townhouse complex in which I live. Many of my neighbors are against this project.  Some, who live close to the proposed site, are against it because of the noise and dust during construction as well as the belief that the tall buildings proposed would block their current view.  Others are against it because they fear more traffic congestion, and less affluent neighbors (which makes no sense because there are apartment buildings all around us.)  Then, there are those of us, myself included that believe that a complex such as the one being proposed would re-vitalize our dying neighborhood (stores are closing all around us) and thereby increase our property values.  But, of course, I’m from New York and my view of density is vastly different from some of my mid-western neighbors.

Asperger’s Syndrome or merely a NERD?

There is a wonderful new sit-com called “The Big Bang Theory” about four Nerds and the “dumb blonde” living across the hall from two of them. All four of these young men lack social and communication skills.  They are all brilliant mathematicians and even have white boards with formulas that they compete about prominently displayed in their living room.  One of them, possibly the most brilliant of all suffers from Asperger’s Syndrome.  It’s a great sit-com and well worth  watching.  Hopefully, it won’t get as ridiculous as other’s do in the next season.

Nerds are common in the High Tech world – here in Silicon Valley and elsewhere in the country.  Because Autism is on the rise – so too is Asperger’s which is considered a high level of functioning for people with autism.

A recent article in the Human Resources Report of BNA, is about Asperger’s and employers’  responsibilities towards people with this disability.  The article, their “Lead Report” starts on page 257 (Vol. 26, #10) and says in part:

Gail Hawkins, author of the book How to Find Work That Works for People with Autism, points out that once these people become comfortable with their work, the workplace and their managers they often “blossom.”  They often excel in jobs that call for logic and analysis, including:

Does this sound familiar to those of you who have attended any of my management training workshops?  It should, these are people on the extreme side of the “Cognitive Styles Scale” that are termed Obsessive-Compulsives or (O-C’s.)  They are all around us and quite necessary to us.

It is important to realize that this is a hidden disability and people with it need to be protected and given the accommodations that will enable them to be effective in the workplace.  The BNA article points out many discrimination lawsuits because employers were unaware of the need, or unwilling to make these accommodations.

Training, training, training – gee where have I said that before.  Managers need to be trained to understand this disability.  HR personnel need to be trained, and so too do co-workers.  And, yes, the person(s) who are NERDS and/or have this syndrome also need to be trained – in communication, social skills, and getting along well with others.  These are called “soft skills”.

I’ve frequently been called in to help individuals who are considered socially awkward improve their skills.  I’ve also been in situations where it became necessary to have a round table session with o-workers who were grumbling and griping.

Do you think some of our more notable CEOs might be suffering from (or have suffered from in the past) Asperger’s?  I betcha you could name names.

Norm Ledgin who wrote:  Insight and Hope Through Famous Role Models suggests that similar characteristics could be found in Albert Einstein, Ludwig van Beethoven, Thomas Jefferson, [Thomas Jefferson???] Charles Darwin and Marie Curie.

Market Yourself Assertively

Michael Luckman is the CEO and Head Trainer of Achievex Corp. an organization that teaches Sandler Training.  He’s been kind enough to include me in his e-mail newsletter, where he produces what he calls “This Week’s Meeting Minute.”  In this week’s gem, he tells us to be assertive and direct in asking for the sale.  He says:

If we pretend to act polite, skirt the real issues, or not face the prospect head on, then we’ve not only wimped out right then and there, we’ve wimped out on our goals, our family and the sales profession as a whole.”

This is clearly great advice for those of us stuck with the prospect of marketing and selling our own professional services.  We were taught the opposite.  We were taught that as professionals we should not solicit business, but wait for it to come to us.  As women, of a certain age, we were taught the same thing about dating.  So, it’s hard to sell!

So for most of us as professionals, particularly women, it’s really hard to ask for the order.  It’s even harder to continue to “remind” clients and potential clients that they said they would be using your services “in the near future.”  When, I ask myself, has it crossed the line from polite reminders to bugging people I really like and want to do business with (You know who you are!).

A client of mine, a woman in a sales related business told me she had been taught that it takes at least 20 phone calls before you get the appointment.  Oh, my!  Isn’t that really bugging?

I really thrive on your referrals to me.  Keep them coming

My Blog

www.DiamondAssociates.net/blog - Visit ME!

Speeches Past and Recent Future

Prior Newsletters

Other articles in prior newsletters can be found here:
 http://diamondassociates.net/articles/Newsletters.shtml

Recent Publications

Several more of my articles have been published in dozens of e-magazines and newsletters.  These articles are being published so frequently that I can’t list all of the references.  Instead, I suggest you Google:  ArLyne Diamond.

Here are some though:

My two published books are available at www.ProductivePublications.com.

So, how can I help you?

Beginning in early 2001, we engaged the services of Dr. ArLyne Diamond to help the San Mateo County Transit District effect a cultural change through leadership training and coaching.  Simply stated, her performance was exceptional.  Her coaching produced demonstrable differences in the leadership qualities exhibited by our managers and key staff members and resulted in significantly improved relationships throughout the organization. 

I strongly recommend ArLyne’s services to any organization particularly one that wants to confront its performance objectives head-on.  Her approach is direct and unequivocal.  Most of our staff members found her style refreshing and provocative, but individuals must be willing to face sometimes difficult realities in order to implement her suggestions.  An example is the “360 degree management evaluations” in which performance assessments are generated both up and down the chain of command.  In the process, our supervisors and managers were exposed to some candid appraisals by subordinates.  While initial reactions were sometimes unsettling, there was general agreement that the outcome led to a stronger, more competent team.

ArLyne is an extremely well trained, highly motivated individual who draws upon years of experience and a superb educational background.  Despite her direct approach, she presents her programs in a casual and warm manner and is able to relate well to people of all persuasions.

Michael Scanlon
CEO Samtrans.


ArLyne Diamond, Ph.D

 

Let me be your Aufin—your advisor to Kings.

 

ArLyne Diamond, Ph.D
ArLyne@DiamondAssociates.net

Diamond Associates     3567 Benton St., #315, Santa Clara, CA 95051     408-554-0110